Why can't we all just get along?

I went to a fast food restaurant this morning and I happened to sit across a Muslim couple who were also having their breakfast. The couple was adorned in their traditional Islamic attire; the man was wearing a galabiyya and the woman was wearing an abaya. An abaya is a flowing and non-clingy dress which covers a woman’s entire body including the face, with a bit of space left for the eyes. Now, eating for this woman, proved to be quite a difficult task because each time she was putting food in her mouth she had to lift a part of the abaya in order to eat. On more than one occasion, our eyes met, and I could sense that she was feeling self-conscious. Feeling a bit awkward myself, I quickly looked away, but only to be led by my eyes back there again. As much as a part of me felt like letting her out of her misery by going up to her and ripping the abaya off her face, but another very sane part of me told me that this was her choice and I should respect it. Which is more than what I can say for controversial columnist Jon Qwelane who recently wrote a column against gays and lesbians entitled, “Call me names, but gay is NOT okay..." In the article, Qwelane writes: "The real problem, as I see it, is the rapid degradation of values and traditions by the so-called liberal influences of nowadays; you regularly see men kissing other men in public, walking holding hands and shamelessly flaunting what are misleadingly termed their 'lifestyle' and 'sexual preferences'."As you can imagine, this article got quite a response from both the gay and lesbian community and civil society alike.

In his response, Qwelane’s said he was exercising his freedom of speech but even my 12 year-old sister will tell you that freedom of speech shouldn’t infringe on human rights. But what troubles me more than anything is the intolerance shown by someone who is supposedly the custodian of society. As a media practitioner, Qwelane knows that he has a responsibility to educate and inform society and not in any way incite or write anything which can be interpreted as derogatory. But Qwelane is not solely to blame for this article because he may have written it but he didn’t decide that it should be published. In a newspaper, an article goes through no less than three people before final publication. So this was a collective decision which may have been informed by revenue or the staff at Sunday Sun are homophobic. No doubt, the media plays a major role in shaping our society whether positively or negatively, and in some parts the media does tend to sensationalize and put profit ahead of content. Besides, the South African Constitution clearly stipulates that gay and lesbian marriages are legal, so whether anyone thinks it’s right or wrong is immaterial. I don’t even want to get started on ANC Youth League president Julius Malema’s utterances because he’s just not worth me mentioning him. But a person I will mention is a Cape Town Christian preacher who referred to Islam as a “puppet religion.” I’m a Christian myself and I may not read the bible as much as I should but I know that one of the central teachings of Christianity is tolerance and not being judgmental. The way that I see it is that it starts with acceptance; accepting people for who they are and respecting them for choosing who they want to be. I think once everyone gets their heads around that, we’ll all be one big happy family.